Waiting to Exhale

Racing rather shakily through the busy Saturday streets of DC via bike rental, I breathed in the last bit of lingering Cherry Blossoms in the air. This particular day, I woke up replaying the night before over and over in my head, considering the events and meticulously sifting through every occurrence and what could have been done differently. So needless to say, an outdoor excursion was a mandatory feat. As I drifted further and further into my own thoughts, I quickly recollected my nowness at the sound of a blaring horn from a huge travel bus. Once I hopped my tires on to the side walk, I almost ran over a group of pedestrians. Now it may seem that I was out of control, because in fact, I was. I wrapped my head around this string of events, as a connection between the way our bodies react and how we process life events. I considered it this way, the bus driver blew his horn because I was in his way, not because, he had plans to hurt me. In a similar light, I almost hurt other people, due to my own fear and need for personal protection. Quite often we replay in our minds what we could have done differently to avoid being hurt by someone else, when in fact their hurt, hurt us, not the person themselves. It's quite possible that someone hurt you because you were simply a casualty within the scope of their tornadic reach. Accept that although you're hurt now, maybe it was never even about you. Pain and fear are the weapons, the person who hurt you is no more than the messenger, merely a vessel. Don't inhale what someone else is waiting to exhale.